Beneath the Night Tree by Nicole Baart

Author:Nicole Baart
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub
Publisher: Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.
Published: 2011-01-31T22:00:00+00:00

Decisions

I was engaged.

Beloved. A wanted woman. A wife-to-be.

Ever since I was a little girl, I had longed to hear those four incomparable words—Will you marry me? I believed they would validate my existence, affirm my worth, make me feel cherished and special and deserving of love. Marriage was a thing of beauty, a promise of “till death do us part” underpinned with declarations of commitment, devotion, and happily ever after.

But after only five minutes of wearing the ring, I knew that engagement was a different thing altogether.

As Michael drove me home, we talked about the particulars. Or at least, we tried to.

“I was thinking a June wedding,” he told me as he turned out of the restaurant parking lot. “Early in the month.”

“June?” He might as well have said next week, June felt so close.

“Yeah. It’ll be perfect timing. I’ll finish up classes in the middle of May, and then we can get married, move, and have a week or so to settle in before I start my summer program.”

“You’re doing a summer program?”

“Well, I’m applying. I just heard about it a few days ago. It’s eight weeks long, but it’ll give me a big head start if I’m accepted. I’ll be shadowing a physician, working in an emergency room, doing a clinical care-based case study . . .”

I managed to utter, “Sounds exciting,” but the only thing I could think about was how Daniel, Simon, and I would spend those long hours in a new city while Michael slaved away at the university hospital.

“Don’t worry,” he said as if reading my mind. “There will be lots for you to do. Iowa City is a great place to live. We have tons of parks and trails, a couple of nice lakes nearby, and a really cool summer rec league. I’ve already checked into it.”

“Daniel’s in kindergarten,” I said softly.

“He’ll be eligible this summer. He could play soccer, tennis, or T-ball . . . or you can sign him up for swimming lessons. He’ll love it!”

“And Simon?”

Michael glanced at me out of the corner of his eye. It was too dark for me to read his expression, but I bristled a little when he asked, “Is Simon coming with us?”

The realization that I didn’t know the answer to that question made me deflate like a slashed tire. “I don’t know,” I admitted. “What else would he do?”

“Stay with Nellie? What about Janice? Have you heard from Janice lately?”

Of course I hadn’t heard from Janice. What was he thinking? But I bit back my prickly retort and said, “I don’t know what Simon wants. I guess we’ve got some things to work out.”

Michael laughed. “That’s marriage! Compromise, fighting over the blankets, and sacrificing for the one you love.”

But I couldn’t help feeling like I was the only one who had to sacrifice anything.

We drove in silence for a few minutes, Michael’s hand over mine on the gearshift of his car. When he had to switch gears, he pressed my hand against the smooth ball of the shaft and slid the car from first to second or third to fourth.

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